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Sacrifices Must Be Made

12 July 2007 - 7:00am — Christopher Wright
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Help Desk, by Christopher B. Wright
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This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 License.

Comic Transcript

BOSS: We cannot allow Scott to resign. We must find a way to force him to stay!

ALICE: Maybe we don't have to coerce him at all. Maybe we can appeal to his better nature.

BOSS: I do not enjoy appealing to a humans better nature.

ALICE: I know, but think about it -- if we allow Scott to do some "good" things on the job -- make it easier for him to actually help customers, things like that -- then he'll be more inclined to stay.

BOSS: ... help customers?

ALICE: But only him! The small number of customers he helps will never measure up to the sheer volume of evil we produce very day. It won't affect our bottom line at all, but will keep Scott satisfied with his job.

BOSS: So we permit some good in order to serve the greater evil.

ALICE: Exactly. Does that bother you?

BOSS: No, but I think Google owns the patent.

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Comments

How to get Scott back

12 July 2007 - 12:50pm — Anonymous (not verified)

Why not offer him an iphone if he quits, it'll make him feel bad... very bad... Because that's why I thought he wanted in the first place.

Backwards?

12 July 2007 - 11:01pm — ccanni1028

Wouldn't they want to offer him an iPhone if he doesn't quit? The reason he quit is because everyone else got an iPhone besides him.

Getting Scott back, and afterwards...

13 July 2007 - 2:00am — Stephan Hodges (not verified)

Wouldn't want to miss the opportunity to publicly spin his "good deads" as an example of how the company is helping everyone, and shows off how "good" the company actually is. Perhaps he should be asked to work for reduced or free (no pay) so that they can even claim he's doing "charity" work. Of course, allow him to work more hours (for same or reduced pay too).

You could let him go on talk shows to promote the company's "help everyone" program, etc. That could take some interesting turns too.

Any romance in Scott's life? Nah, that's too low a tactic to keep him...